Us gays like to believe we have something that we like to call a ‘Gaydar’. Said Gaydar, or gay radar, is our talent for distinguishing between gay and straight men. Fag Hags pick up this talent pretty quickly as well, and sometimes develop a better Gaydar than some of us who have been practicing for years.
Anyway, sometimes our Gaydars are a little faulty. Sometimes they are just outright completely wrong. Of course, we like to believe that we’re always right, but sometimes, and I’ll admit it, I simply proclaim some guy must be gay, to convince myself that I may have a shot with him.
I usually wouldn’t just make statements about someone else’s sexuality unless I’m pretty sure. The above mentioned cases are only when guys are seriously crazy hot. I do have a friend though, that loves proclaiming, loudly and very publicly, when guys are gay. This would probably be okay, if he wasn’t wrong 99 percent of the time.
Before I continue, of course he’s been right a few times. Statically, when you believe that everyone is gay, you’d have to be right at some point. This is the only reason he’s ever right.
So, the other day when we found out that someone was bi, he of course said that he had told me so, and how could I ever doubt his Gaydar. In his opinion it’s always on point. I’ve actually given up pointing out that the whole statistics thing, he’d convinced himself of his absolute talent to tell sexuality from a distance of 500m ages ago.
He’s also convinced that he’s going to end up with a very cute straight boy in my class. Sometimes I wish that I could be as positively optimistic as him, but then I remember that being realistic has saved me in some potentially embarrassing situations.
I guess that’s all I had to say. Just, don’t get too positive about a boy before you know if he likes what ya got, if you know what I mean.